…”Later on, Christian takes Ana on his private helicopter to his condo in the Escala Building in Seattle. There, he shows her his “playroom”, which is filled with BDSM (Bondage Dominance Submission Masochism) materials like ropes, chains, whips, and floggers. Christian explains that he is “dominant” and enjoys doing certain things with the consent of other women. Ana asks if it is love-making, but Christian says he doesn’t make love, he “(CENSORED) hard”…
…”Before Ana goes home, Christian gives her a folder with a contract and certain guidelines/explanations for their BDSM arrangement. When she gets home, Ana finds that Christian has sent her a laptop for them to keep in touch and for her to do research on the subject. Ana looks over the list of explanations for the dominant and submissive, including certain sex acts and codes during the actual acts. Ana is both curious and a bit mortified upon learning some of these things. She sends Christian a message saying it was nice knowing him. Not too happy with this statement, Christian shows up in Ana’s room. He gets her to lay in bed and he ties her wrists together with his necktie. He blindfolds her with her t-shirt and gets the rest of her clothes off. He kisses her body and runs an ice cube across her bare chest and stomach with his mouth. He then turns her around and starts to have sex with her doggie-style.”
…”When she tells Christian, he angrily accuses her of getting pregnant on purpose and leaves. He returns early the next morning drunk, stating that Ana will choose their new baby over him. While undressing him in his drunken state, Ana is furious to see a text message on Christian’s phone from Elena Lincoln, his mother’s friend older who seduced him when he was fifteen and introduced him to the BDSM lifestyle. The message indicates that he was out drinking with her. The next two mornings Ana and Christian barely speak out of anger: Christian because of the unplanned pregnancy; and Ana because of his late night visit with Mrs. Lincoln. Christian indirectly implies that he wants her to have an abortion…”
- Bondage “tying, binding, or restraining a person for the sexual, aesthetic, and/or psychological pleasure of the parties involved.“
- Dominance “the state that exists when one person or group has power over another.“
- Sadism “derivation of pleasure as a result of inflicting pain or watching pain inflicted on others.“
- Masochism “the receiving of pleasure—often sexual—from acts involving the infliction or reception of pain or humiliation.“
These are quotes are from IMDb. They are plot summaries from the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy. People are reading and watching as this girls innocence and virginity are lost (outside of marriage) and they cheer them along never realizing that this ‘love’ story misses the mark on who God has created us to be. I could go on and on about how broken my heart is seeing people who claim to love and serve Jesus going to see this movie or reading this book but instead I want to show you a different perspective. I also want to clarify something because this post can and probably will come across judgmental…
(I AM NOT SAYING YOU ARE NOT A CHRISTIAN IF YOU READ OR WATCH THESE MOVIES BUT I AM SAYING IF YOU CAN SIT THERE AND READ/WATCH ANY OF THIS WITHOUT ANY FORM OF CONVICTION YOU SHOULD PROBABLY CHECK YOURSELF AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS. IF YOU DO NOT HAVE ANY CONVICTIONS THEN YOU NEED TO GET IN THE WORD BECAUSE WHEN WE STEP INTO A RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS WE ALSO RECEIVE THE HOLY SPIRIT. THE HOLY SPIRIT CONVICTS…AND I COULD BARELY TYPE THE ABOVE DEFINITIONS AND SUMMARIES WITHOUT CONVICTIONS.)
Now I am not going to sit here and type all the reasons why this movie/book is terrible and wrong and literally disgusting because that is not my job, you already know all of those things. But I am going to shed light on an area you might not have thought about… So I am going to be really honest my heart is broken over the wide spread excitement over “fifty shades of grey”. I think my perspective is different than most and this is why…pornography is at an all time high right now, domestic violence and abuse has sky rocketed, and there are children as young as 4 being sold into sex slavery everyday (if you want statistics they are at the bottom). You’re asking me,”What does that have to do with this book/movie?” and here is your answer. After reading reviews and the summary of the book I can only draw one conclusion, this type of “accepted” literature and movie is going force us and our children to face a new kind of sexual numbness. It is going to create an inability to be intimate and enter into real intimacy in marriage relationships. It is going to open the door for sex traffickers to start viewing their way of life as “Hollywood” worthy and artistic. This Hollywood “mommy porn”, which is literally what people are referring to it as, will open doors for your sons to say “well my mom watches it”. It will open doors for your daughters to say “well thats how Christian Grey treats women and you seem to really enjoy that..”
So really, is it worth it?
I have spent time in countries where young girls have lived this “50 shades of grey”, but unwillingly. They are tied to beds while being beaten, raped, tortured, and thrown into the “erotic” red room, not by choice, but by force. And as you sit in your comfy theatre chair watching this young woman choose to be tortured in hopes that she can save this mans soul from being broken…I want you to think about the millions of young women who at that same moment are being tortured by force in hopes that someone somewhere will come and save them from being broken.
This trilogy
-romanticizes sadistic perpetrators
-it classifies women as a enslaved class of sexual objects that men use and consume
-redefines love by replacing respect and compassion with abuse and narcissistic pleasure-seeking
-mainstreams and normalizes BDSM.
If you have children, can you seriously sit through a book or movie and imagine your son or daughter in this type of “relationship” that over 7 million women are “obsessed” with. If you don’t have children you will one day and it will be the most amazing adventure of your life. Like I said before I could go on and on but instead I will leave you with these statistics…
General pornography stats
- Every second 28,258 users are watching pornography on the internet
- Every second $3,075.64 is being spent on pornography on the internet
- Every second 372 people are typing the word “adult” into search engines
- 40 million American people regularly visit porn sites
- 35% of all internet downloads are related to pornography
- 25% of all search engine queries are related to pornography, or about 68 million search queries a day
- One third of porn viewers are women
- Search engines get 116,000 queries every day related to child pornography
- 34% of internet users have experienced unwanted exposure to pornographic content through ads, pop up ads, misdirected links or emails
- 2.5 billion emails sent or received every day contain porn
- Every 39 minutes a new pornography video is being created in the United States
- About 200,000 Americans are “porn addicts”
Youth pornography stats
- Teenagers with frequent exposure to sexual content on TV have a substantially greater likelihood of teenage pregnancy; and the likelihood of teen pregnancy was twice as high when the quantity of sexual content exposure within the viewing episodes was high.
- Pornography viewing by teens disorients them during the developmental phase when they have to learn how to handle their sexuality and when they are most vulnerable to uncertainty about their sexual beliefs and moral values
- A significant relationship also exists among teens between frequent pornography use and feelings of loneliness, including major depression
- Adolescents exposed to high levels of pornography have lower levels of sexual self-esteem
Family/Marital pornography stats
- According to National Coalition for the Protection of Children & Families, 2010, 47% of families in the United States reported that pornography is a problem in their home.
- Pornography use increases the marital infidelity rate by more than 300%
- 40 percent of “sex addicts” lose their spouses, 58 percent suffer considerable financial losses, and about a third lose their jobs
- 68% of divorce cases involve one party meeting a new paramour over the internet while 56% involve one party having an “obsessive interest” in pornographic websites
I honestly had to comment before I even finished reading because I think this is so valid, but it is often not well-received. This series disturbs me on so many levels, but I was really amazed when I saw an interview with the female lead last week. They asked a question about what she takes away from this series, and she laughed while commenting how traumatizing it was to shoot. Our culture is numb to so many things, and I agree that this is taking us in a terrible direction. If you haven’t read Love that Lasts by Jeff and Alyssa Bethke, I would highly recommend it. I honestly will vouch more for the chapters he wrote. He makes some excellent points and touches on the porn stats today, what real love means, and so many other great things.
I agree 100% the numbness is heartbreaking and overwhelming, especially as a new Mom to a little boy.
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